I'd like to think that I am fluent in coffeehouse. Perhaps I should add that to my resume as a second language. For some reason, coffee shops are always filled with college students and recent graduates who probably shouldn't spend $4 on a drink in the first place.
And as I wait patiently in line, I contemplate what each order says about the person. This is what I came up with:
1. Frappachino - Your friends dragged you here so you will drown your disgust for coffee in a sea of syrup and whipped cream. Traits: easy-going, crowd follower, child at heart
2. Cappuccino (extra dry) - You spent a semester in Italy and want to still reminisce the days of sipping cappuccinos at an outdoor cafe. Traits: sophisticated, a tad bit uppity, classic
3. Pumpkin/peppermint mocha/salted caramel flavored latte - You tire of ordering the same drink day after day so your order changes with the season. Traits: indecisive, trendy
4. Coffee. Black. - You survive on caffeine and coffee is a necessity not a luxury. You appreciate the complex flavors of each blend and want to enjoy them uninterrupted by competing flavors. Traits: focused, determined, simplistic
5. Chai latte - You need a pick me up before going to yoga class and napping in your Enu hammock. Traits: healthy, calm, responsible